Down

We're down and out on the streets tonight

No money in our pockets

Just a paper for our blanket.

We hang our hearts and tears out to dry

And they shake in the rasping branches

Of the winter trees.

Our memories are hiding 

In the bruises that cover our backs and knees

As the blood is gushing below

Held back by the translucent skins.

I don't know what I'm thinking tonight, maybe it's the rain that's getting to me, I'm just not sure. Ignore my ramblings. I have pictures from a couple weeks ago that I've been meaning to post, I just haven't gotten around to it yet. 

Some Thoughts

I’ll keep my eyes open so long as you don’t mind. I’ll keep them open and searching. Looking for something new, something I haven’t seen before. But I think, for the most part, I’ve seen this before… I’ve seen this all before. I’m waiting for the cat to jump out from behind a wall, for some surprise to enter into the fragile existence of life. It won’t though. It all just stays the same. Each day passing like the ticking of a clock. Until one day, it stops. We’ll wind it up again when that day comes. Wind our selves with the little silver keys. The ones we each received when we were young, when we learned the truth. That in childhood you make all your discoveries, after that it is simply repeated. Digging the same holes in the same earth, yearning for the same answers, the same destination. This is why everything is so familiar, why we’ve seen this all before. But still we do it, winding ourselves up, starting it all over again. So if I never found the bones, will I never find them in this life? No, I think not. I hope that I might, that things may change, that this unending repetition may end. I’m hoping for the surprise, but we all know that hope is not enough. Nothing is enough to end the rotation of events, the endless spiral that is our lives.

Unedited and raw. This is how I have felt and thought lately

True

I want to be like the sea lions,

I want to spend my days in the ocean,

Watching the light turn the water into the most brilliant shades

Of green and blue.

I want it to be true.

I want it all to be true,

And I want to know,

I want to know everything there is to know,

At least about you.

Bright Star

After seeing this post over on frolic, I decided I had to watch Bright Star. I am so glad that I did. It is the kind of movie that embodies my daydreams. There are so many little details throughout the whole thing, just the location itself was amazing. In addition, the light, cinematography, and everything else was beautiful. I however, may be biased toward liking romantic films full of letters and poetry. As deep down I'm an endless romantic as well as still hiding a desire to become a poet (which will probably never happen). My favorite scene byfar though was the room full of butterflies. It made me want summer to be here, to go out and collect butterflies in jars and let them fly around my room.

I also think that in a former life I may have been a man in the early 1800's, I'm so in love with the way they dress, I wish I could look as smart and put together as they do.

Heart

Sometimes it feels like my heart skips a beat.

It's quite unnerving.

It makes me wonder what others are feeling.

There has to be more to life.

Why I gave up wanting to be a poet

The inside of my mind is a mysterious place,

It is full of many things I would rather not see.

There are ghosts of past lives and the monsters that wait to be released

And there are dreams of golden meadows and bubbling creeks,

Beside the memories of happy times passed and of woes the remain

And seem, to my heart, stain.

There have been a lot of different thoughts floating around my head lately, I'm not sure where my life is going right now and that bothers me and excites me at the same time. I think that the problem is I don't know what it is I truly want and when I look around at those I am surrounded by here, well they all know, they all know what they want. And now you know why I gave up wanting to be a poet.

PS This photo is by Lorena Arance. I love her photos here and here and what she had to say here. I completely agree with her on everything in regards to photographic processes. And she just seems like a lovely person.