Happier and Light Hearted

I want to know where this came from, I found it somewhere a long time ago and saved it, I know that where ever I found it got it from tumblr, but it's the words I'm more interested in. Where did they come from? And how do you become that gosh darn poetic?

Coincidences

Some days I feel like the world is just one big spiral, that your life always comes back to the same things, even if you don't know that it was there before. There are simply too many coincidences.

I'm sorry if my posts have been short and somewhat un-optimistic, I'm beginning to realize what I want to accomplish in my life and how slowly that is going to happen if I continue to approach life as I have in the past. I want to have some sort of goal to work towards, somewhere for my life to end up. I'm still trying to figure out where that is though.

I'll post something more fun and light hearted in a few minutes, though I'm sure no one is reading this at such a late hour (I must be getting old, I think 11:30 is a late hour).

Notes on Portland Architecture

I'm quite disappointed by these photos, but I thought that I would share them, nonetheless. Lately, I have been fascinated by the architecture of Portland. It's such a perfect combination of old and new, each building seems to work with those around it perfectly. And looking up at the buildings instead of focusing on the street has really made me see a lot more things that I had never noticed before. It's strange, but it's nice. School's officially begun for me now and I have to say I am truly enjoying myself. I need to remember, though, that I can't just lock myself away in my room and study, eat, and sleep all the time. I need to get out and do things with my friends too. I think I forget that sometimes. It's easy for me to just hide away from the world and I am trying to keep from doing that this year... so far... I've been pretty unsuccessful.

Autumn

I wrote tonight. It's unusual that I do any creative writing anymore. I think it helps me keep my sanity when I feel like I don't have any left. Which is how I felt. I keep thinking that one day I will finish one of the writing projects I begin, that I will create something in any art medium that I love. But it keeps not happening. School starts again tomorrow. I have classes at eight, so I should really be heading to sleep soon, but I just wanted to share this lovely series of photos by this talented gal. They make me want to be somewhere where autumn has actually begun it's descent on the world. Oh, and I also decided that when I am finished with school, I do not want to live in the city. I'm already getting tired of it, it just makes me lonely and I don't want to be lonely for the rest of my life. I would much rather live in the middle of nowhere (as long as I wasn't living there alone) or at least somewhere that doesn't make me feel like this. I want to see woods and fields and loveliness in autumn, not city-ness. But, I'll keep an open mind, perhaps this year autumn will go better than it did for me last year. I am counting on that. I'm counting on life being better than it was last year.

Ok, enough rambling.

Dreams

Don't you ever feel like this all must be a dream, nothing more?

The Zoo

Sorry I've been away for so long, I've been moving, spending time with Shawn, and just generally enjoying the last few days before school starts. Unfortunately, I've also been on the sick side the last couple of days, but I'm feeling better today, so at least I won't have to worry about being sick and going to classes. While I was gone from here I went to the zoo, all the animals seemed very happy to see us. I actually was sitting face to face with the male orangutan at one point, but I was too stunned to take a picture, darn it. I also saw Modest Mouse in concert, it was a great concert, even if they took a while to get on stage (I'm sure they had their reasons). The last couple of days though, like I already said, I haven't been feeling all that great, so I've spent most of my time moping around my room, trying to feel better.

Tomorrow is my last day before classes start again. I cannot wait! Yep, I'm one of those nerdy people that get overly-excited for school to start again. Now if my textbooks would just get here already... why can't mail be delivered on Sundays? Oh well, I'll just have to wait.

What I do when I'm bored

I forget about everything, so sticky notes are my best friend. Although, I have to say I think I may have put too much effort into these ones (I plan on re-using the green ones as I continue to run out of the same things and forgetting about it over and over this year). Hey, at least I was some-what productive, right?

Oh, I almost forgot, I am considering taping/gluing an actual almond onto the picture of the almond butter jar, what do you think?

Sunlight

I finally feel pretty moved in to my new place up in Portland (yes, I'm back in Portland, now you don't have to listen to me talk about moving anymore). There is a tree right outside my window that makes some pretty patterns with the afternoon sunlight all over my room, I'm in love with it right now. I am also enjoying my new plant, a cactus, which I have named Zeus. I haven't gotten around to putting anything on the walls so they are still starkly white, but there are no more boxes to be unpacked and almost everything has found at least a temporary place (until I feel like really organizing everything).

Drifting

I know I should be sleeping, there is no excuse for why I'm not currently dreaming away. But I am dreaming, I'm dreaming of autumn, of being free to travel, of seeing everything, of doing everything that I dream of accomplishing in my life. I want it all to happen now, but that would be way too easy. I guess I won't have to wait much longer for autumn to arrive, at least one of my dreams is coming true soon.

Sources: 1 (via). 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.

Last Days

Well, the time has come, there are only two more days left until I head back up north (that is an over-statement, Portland is north of Bend, but not by much on world distance standards). I've had random people ask me to do things before I leave and when I get up there, but my plans are pretty well set (at least for me they seem to be, I don't really plan). I move on Saturday, spend Sunday with my family, get settled in on Monday, possibly spend Tuesday at the zoo, then on Wednesday... GO TO SEE MODEST MOUSE!

I think I may get overly-excited about these things.

Anyway, I have lots to get done tomorrow (when I say that I mean Thursday) and Friday, but I can't seem to get to sleep tonight, even though I am actually pretty tired. It seems that sleep has been eluding me more and more this summer, I don't know how I am going to survive with that 8am class this fall... lots and lots of coffee and chai, that's for sure.

Here are a few things I have been meaning to share with everyone for the past week or so:

These are the deer that live near Shawn's house. I think it's a little bit funny how excited he and his parents get about them, but that's because when I was younger herds of 10-20 deer roamed my neighborhood and attacked my mother's flower gardens, so I think of them as flower-destroyers, not the cute little things they really are, especially the fawns.

This is the first of my breakfasts a couple of days ago. It was a failure though, we were out of milk, so no cereal for me (wait until you hear about the rest of it).

This was attempt number two at breakfast, looks like some yummy sourdough toast, right? Nope, that is GARLIC sourdough bread, no thanks, not with my orange juice.

This is what I finally ended up trying to actually eat for breakfast that day. However, I forgot: I don't really like peanut butter very much.

This is the peanut butter I eat, I love it, as much as I can love peanut butter (I can't). In fact, I think I am going to switch to almond butter, it's so much more delicious.

So those are some silly, random things that have been going on, this just makes me look like a really boring person.

I apologize to anyone that I just put to sleep, hopefully you don't drool too much and ruin your computers.

Finished

Well, time is ticking and autumn is finally coming. Or so I thought for a little while there, the last few days the weather has been hot, hot, hot. And then today, there were thunderstorms and rain all day. Not that I wasn't happy to see some rain (wait and see if I'll be saying that in a few months). I worked for the last time this summer tonight, it was fun, and I'll definately miss the free candy. But, I need to eat less candy anyway. This week I am going to spend my time doing laundry, packing up the last of my stuff for Portland, painting an old dresser (no more bright pink or flowers everywhere, hooray!) and spending time just having fun. Hopefully the weather will cool off a bit, I like those perfect in-between days where you don't need a jacket but you aren't frying like an egg on a hot sidewalk (you can actually do that, I tried it once. I didn't eat the egg though, and I wouldn't recommend it if you decide to fry one, it just isn't sanitary).

Moonshine

I'm not feeling all that great tonight, my solution: sleep, relaxing tomorrow (probably by spending lots of time in bed) and drinking lots of tea.

Sources: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Light + Dark

I love photographing contrasts between light and dark.

This was my brother's room at some point this moring, he put a blanket up over the window to block the light from my neighbors yard.

I'm pathetically boring lately, earlier today I got excited about a 1973 National Geographic article about finding the then oldest remains of a human ancestor (actually, I think that they are still the oldest, but I'm not sure, I'm not remembering things like I usually do). I am becoming nerdier by the minute.

A Fond Farewell

I must wish summer a fond farewell today, there was truly a chill in the air that I must say was autumnal (although that is apparently debatable). I wish I was flying away tonight, somewhere exciting and new, because that is what this summer felt like, it was something exciting and new, I rediscovered so many old loves of mine, and also found so many news things in life to enjoy just as much or, in some cases, more. Autumn, however feels overly-familiar, like something I have experienced time and again. It feels as if nothing exciting can come of it, though I am sure there will be plenty of excitement. Like tonight for example, I went to see Brett Dennen, who was even greater live. I know that there will be plenty of things going on in my life in the coming months, what with school and possibly working, but at the same time I feel as if my future is uncertain, like my life right now is at an important point where I need to make a decision. That feeling is just making me more indecisive than usual, which I'm sure is beginning to annoy the people that have to deal with me on a daily basis. I also feel like I am wasting all my time doing nothing, I need to start being at least a little more productive because, at least in my mind, summer is over with, and with it all of it's laziness needs to go away. However, I am holding on to it, but not anymore after today, tomorrow I am going to begin my new productive time as autumn once again enters my life. And at some point I'm going to figure out something more interesting to tell you all about and maybe figure out where my life is going because right now I feel like I have no direction behind my actions. I need lists.

Sorry that was so long, rambly, and uninteresting; I'm tired and restless at the same time right now, I need to go to sleep.

Apologies

I'm sorry I have been missing for the past few days, I have been busy working and just having fun (which I must say is one of the best things to be busy at). Anyway, yesterday, I spent the day in Eugene, helping Shawn to move some of his stuff over into his new place. It seems that while I was gone, autumn officially and completely arrived here in Bend. I'm going to have to go through the boxes I've already packed and find some jackets now, I was thinking the summer weather would last at least until I moved up to Portland again, but that is Central Oregon for you, you never know what the weather is going to do. I was also excited to see when I got back this morning that the mountains got at least a dusting of snow, they look even better now, and much cleaner. Anyway, I for some reason am not working much this week so, hopefully I'll be able to spend my time cleaning, packing, and having fun (I'm hoping for mostly that last one).

P.S. Aren't the counters in Shawn's new kitchen adorable? I love them.

Quoting

"This moment contains all moments."

Thank you C.S. Lewis, for giving me such a grand thing to think about, your words have been stuck in my head since the moment I first read them.